Sunday, November 29, 2009

Paying the Piper

So my "One Day" mentality didn't pan out so well. I'm having a difficult time with sweets... again. It seems like once I get a taste I want more and more. The cravings are intense and constant. The little voice saying "Doesn't that sound GOOD?" is so hard to ignore. And the stuff is here. The pumpkin pie, the chocolate cake, Oreos and the ice cream. And they are all talking to me (and yes, I realize if I think food is talking to me, I'm a little crazy). I'm also having a hard time with something that was said to me on Thanksgiving. That's not helping either. So, time to deal with it. Wanna know what it was? Maybe if I share it will help.
I got called scrawny. Which wasn't really a big deal. My uncle was just trying to be cute. Then came the barrage of questions, "How'd you do it?" etc, etc. I don't do well when the attention is focused on me, so that was very uncomfortable. But then, from across the room, I hear a muttering...."Oh well, she just doesn't eat! THAT'S how she lost the weight." And the tone of voice, the body language, was very hurtful to me. I have worked my butt off, literally, to get where I am right now. I haven't starved myself. I workout, I run, I eat less and I really strive to eat healthy. It just hurts that someone in my family would talk that way....basically to my face. And what I'm realizing now as I write this, I'm giving what this person said way too much importance. I cannot control what others say or think. I can however control what I do. So what am I going to do? I am going to put my big girl pants back on and do what I know I should. Eat well & exercise. Stop making excuses. Enjoy the fact that I set a PR in my 5K. Start training for my second half marathon. Get back to my Insanity workouts (which I love cause they really kick my butt). And finally, start thinking of a way to reward myself for hitting goal, cause I'm really close (not as close as I was a couple days ago, but that's the penalty I pay for gluttony). Keep moving forward right?

4 comments:

Lucy said...

I know exactly how you feel. As I read your post I felt like I knew what you were going to write next. Wow. Be encouraged, you deserve it; walk with your head held high...you know what you've gone through to get where you're at; the sacrifices, the inner struggles.

Greta from www.bigbottomblogger.blogspot.com said...

Shake it off. You have done an excellent job...and YOU know you are healthier and WAY more fit than you were before (and likely more fit than the person who made that comment!). Laugh it off....and keep your focus. You are doing great!!

Brad said...

Good job on losing the weight. Most people dont get how much work it takes to be in shape and many dont want to put in that time.

Insanity kicks my butt too, but I like it a lot.

You should look into being a Beachbody Coach. Go to www.BeachBodyCoach.com/wrkoutjorney and click on the Coach tab to learn more.

Feel free to contact me about it and keep up the good work.

R and R said...

Why do people do that? I have been getting that a lot lately and it really ticks me off! You're right to just shake it off and move on! You are truly an inspiration to a lot of people!

http://gettingitbacktogether.blogspot.com/