a PR and a medal...

Today was my first 5K since Thanksgiving. While I didn't achieve the time I had originally hoped for, I am still very proud of myself. I placed 1st in my age group...woo-hoo! And, I set a new personal record for myself by finishing in 23:39. I finished 33rd overall out of 145 total runners and I was the 5th female across the finish line. I gave it everything I had and that's what matters! Now I'm off to bed so I can be well rested for my 10 mile run tomorrow...oy!

*And just a side note...I went shopping and fit into size 6 jeans! Now I just have to find the "perfect pair"*

Ditching the DIET

I'm tired of dieting. I'm sooo done with dieting. What I am NOT tired of is eating healthy and exercising. I was hit with this realization today that the old habits and old ways of eating need to be put in the past. When I eat healthy I feel great! When I eat crap I feel like crap. I need to concentrate my energies on making good choices and eating well because I want to, not because I'm on a diet. I'm going to eat when I'm hungry. Stop when I'm full. Deal with emotions instead of stuffing them with food. My body wants me to be at a healthy weight so I need to trust that if I give it the proper fuel and nutrition I will get to a weight where I am most healthy.
Leslie over at Get off Your Butt and Get Fit had a post that really struck a cord for me. Her sister-in-law, who used to work at an eating disorder clinic, wrote a great guest post and you can read it here. My blogging buddy Lucy over at Eat When Hungry also got my gears clicking and helped my thinking move in this direction.
So, here's to a healthy lifestyle! Eating well and exercising because it feels good.... and that's what's important.

Forget the chocolate...I'm going running!

I'm back in control which is a much better feeling than the emotional place I was hanging out in for a few days. My 8 mile run on Sunday morning was stellar and as I expected, it cleared out the cobwebs and gave me a lovely start to the day. I finished the run in 1:03:53 (7:59 mi) which BLOWS my mind since last July I ran a 10K (6 miles) in 1:03:48... This is such concrete evidence of how far I've come over the last 10.5 months. And the best part about running the 8 miles, I felt awesome after I finished. I could've kept going. I have 10 miles this coming Sunday and it doesn't worry me now. I've got my mojo back :) Boo-yeah!

New Yummies to try...

Time to share a favorite "food" of mine. I had a whole discussion with my sister-in-law yesterday so I figured y'all would love if I shared too. I tried Almond Milk as an alternative to milk and I absolutely LOVE it. It took a few tastes to get adjusted, but now it's pretty much my go-to "milk". It's perfect plain, in post-workout smoothies, cereal, or in my coffee every morning. I buy the unsweetened vanilla and it's 40 cal for 8oz {it's the one to the far right with the 40 on it :D}. All my local grocery stores carry it. My kids like it too, which is a plus. Now, hopefully they'll eat the brussel sprouts I bought today. I'll let you know how it goes....
Anybody else tried or use alternatives to reg milk? How 'bout brussel sprouts? {Honestly I JUST tried brussel sprouts yesterday...but I loved 'em so I went and got some today to use this week. Thanks Missy-poo for making them soooo yummy!}

You hurt my feelings...where's the chocolate?

*This post contains some foul language...cause that's the kind of mood I'm in*

Today was HORRIBLE! Pretty much a cluster-fuck. Out of control in almost every single way possible. I need to find a way to cope with emotions instead of turning my day into this downward spiral. Usually I get an inkling of a "bad day" coming but today I just got emotional and I couldn't pull myself together. So I ate, and ate, and ate. I know my hormones are going wacky right now as that TOM draws closer, but I am not using that as a crutch. It is a part of the equation, for sure, but not something that is going away, so I have to figure out how to handle it.
Anyway, I've been in tears multiple times today and I really just need a fucking hug...something my husband doesn't quite understand. He just wants to "fix" it. And, I think he thinks sometimes that I have no right being sad or emotional...he's the one that goes out and works, I'm just the stay at home mommy.
Throw in some inconsideration from other people as well and you get to feeling unliked and just not "cool" enough.... which then brings back lots of old hurts from times past. Like I said... cluster-fuck. What a shitty day!
But, tomorrow morning I have an 8 mile run scheduled which I hope will help my emotional state. My alarm is set, my clothes are set out and I am going whether it's pouring rain or not.
And now, if you've finished reading this, thanks. The mood and tone of this post is not my norm, but I needed the catharsis that writing gives me. Again, thanks. Tomorrow will be better. Time to move forward...

Well, I tried....

Since my run on Thursday night ended poorly {mainly because my youngest threw a 30 minute fit for daddy as soon as he realized I was gone and daddy was VERY unhappy by the time I got home} I decided to take the monkey bear with me on my run yesterday. And let me tell you, IT SUCKED!!! I hated pretty much every minute of it. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE power walking with the stroller and can and will walk miles around town, but running with the stroller is entirely different. I may do it from time to time if I'm desperate, but it isn't something I am going to make a habit...

Join me?

I had a couple rough(ish) days with my eating but thankfully I was able to rein it back in and now it's just a hazy memory. Today has been a good day...not awesome, but solid. A few times the thought crossed my mind to overdo it, but I restrained myself. It was Wednesday, which meant a hectic day for me. I managed to eat at the lower end of my calorie range but the percentage of fat/carb/protein today was way out of whack. Tomorrow I know I'll do better.
I also did some thinking today about taking a break from the scale and challenging myself to something new. My thought was to go 2 weeks completely "on plan" {eating clean, calorie cycling, exercising} and no scale.
I've tried to break the habit of getting on everyday, but I still do it. So I think I am going to weigh once more tomorrow morning then it's c'est la vie to the scale till the 18th.... I really hope that without the number in my face constantly I'll be able to hit goal without over thinking it.
Anybody else want to join me in this? It's just 2 weeks...